Monday, December 10, 2012

i'm learning that
sometimes even the really good, wonderful,
exciting, exactly what i want stuff 
can bring on a huge wave a grief...

all i can do is 
ride it, 
feel it, 
let it take me under,
(i've learned fighting it only makes it worse)
then come back up for air.

then repeat as many times 
 as this wave demands...

Sunday, November 25, 2012

 Listening to Shame.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Honoring You

weeping and aching,
i longed to honor
your passing.
i longed to honor
your life.
searching everywhere,
i found only
one answer.

honor myself.

become all
that i am.
and carry you
inside that beauty.

—Terri St. Cloud

Tuesday, November 20, 2012


“she was scared again. 
seems she was scared a lot 
these days.  
time for a deep breath and 
another plunge in. 
it was the only way to get to 
where she wanted to go. 
 so, in she went.”


Friday, November 16, 2012

a year later and my days are still colored by profound sadness... 

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Scott,  dear God how I miss You...
I feel You in my heart everyday and night.
can it really be a full year?
A winter, a spring, a summer and a fall
have all passed without You, 
So many fools days,
Time change days,
all without You.
Now another birthday without 
my birthday buddy to go on a trip with.
My heart aches for You,
for Your touch,
for Your music,
for Your guidance,
for You,
for You.
To lay in bed with You
and share our days,
our dreams, our thoughts,
our love.
I will honor You tomorrow by 
choosing life,
by taking care of myself.
It's what You would want.
I love You now and forever.
Your angel girl ~


Sunday, October 28, 2012

continuing on

“almost crumbling to the ground, 
she stopped. 
looking at how far she had traveled 
and all 
it had 
taken to get there, 
she recognized her strength. 
the strengths she had inside of her, 
the strength she had gained 
along the way ~ 
her inner power. 
and so, 
she stood up. 
standing tall, 
she faced forward and 
continued on.”


Sunday, October 7, 2012